Fighting

Dear Love;

You and I have been through a lot.  You’ve come in and out of my life in a number of different forms.  Sometimes I ignored you.  Other times I held on too tight.  I suspect that now you must be floating over someone else’s head, because I haven’t heard from you in a while.  You can be beautiful, you know.  But also quite cruel.  So I’m asking you to find me once again, and to stay a bit.  We have so much to catch up on, and—as much as I hate to admit it—I miss you.  Please find me and remember that I am still fragile. Be gentle if you break my heart

FML

July 12th

It's amazing. As soon as I saw you, I needed to talk.

 It's like... I don't know. A strong, weird feeling.

 I thought, if I don't talk to you before I go, 

I'd be missing out on... something... important. 

Beautiful.

17 Again

There's No Place Like Home

These Bones

"but I am a believer in predestination. 

I know that whatever would happen will surely happen.

 So I convinced myself that I would never lie,

 whatever the situation was."

- Hassan Bility

Narrow Stairs

"How I wish you could see the potential,

 the potential of you and me. 

Its like a book eloquently bound

 but in a language that you can’t read.”

When Doves Cry

I miss reading Shakespeare

I need to start it up again.

I enjoyed so much reading it and breaking it down. I use to want to be an English Lit major specialized in the area of Shakespeare. But then I realized.....that will not give me a job. 

How unfortunate.

I wish I planned out college better, I could of minor in it and with a concentration in photography. 

I can always take classes on the side but it would have been beneficial to have had this right.

I'll figure this out. 

Reality Bites

Lelaina Pierce: I was really going to be somebody by the time I was 23.

Troy Dyer: Honey, all you have to be by the time you're 23 is yourself

Chemistry

"The meeting of two personalities is like the 

contact of two chemical substances;

 if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”

I Like Big Butts

One of my favorite people is moving back to Canada. I really just want to cry. I can't even see her one last time. I know it's hard for her to be here and her family is there. FUCK IMMIGRATION. I just know I'm going to miss her so much that I don't know now. My summer was going to be amazing because she was going to be part of it. When I go home, she won't be there. I wish this was easier. I wont see her until bamboozle. And that's a maybe. I don't know. No one really knows, I just told Lauren. I couldnt keep it in. I miss her already. These are the times where I feel incredibly alone.

Such Great Heights

There's something liberating about when you feel free from your past and the pain of being hurt by someone you so passionately loved. 

I may never love someone else the way I loved you. I know I won't. I'm not looking to replace you.

Yes, I loved you to the end of the world. But, I was careless and couldn't handle the situation. I was a child. I think over the past year, I let you go and finally put you away. While, it's taken me years to even get here, I am here. I always say I'm over you, well this is a process for me. Sorry I can't be like you. But this past year, with the experiences I've had and the people I've met, pieces of you inside of me have faded away. I don't know right now if you're completely gone, but I do know I'm a step closer to never feeling that pain again. 

I don't need to hurt you to feel better about myself. That's something I've learned won't help me. I also don't need to know anything about you, because that's useless. 

I say you were fortunate enough to have an extra person in your life who cared for your well-being, even if you didn't want it. There can never be enough love in the world. 

My biggest accomplish was that I don't care of what you think of me anymore. I secretly wanted you to fall back in love with me. I know that'll never will happen. Not because I don't deserve your love. Because, it simply won't. 

My outlook on life, my poise, my philosophies, my attitude, my appreciate for everything stems from my experience with you. I will be grateful for that, secretly. I look at where my life and ideals were headed, it flabbergast me. I don't think I would have ever gotten off course if it wasn't for that pain caused by our relationship.

So yes, there is a reason for everything. Yes, there is light at the end of the dark tunnel. I was in the darkness for the longest time. A period in my life I'm happy I've lived through. A period that was so dark, it now only feels like a nightmare. Then I entered the shadow of the light and lingered. I didn't want to let go. I put myself through more torture because I didn't know how to do anything else but be in love with you. But then, I felt the warmth of the rays and I finally made my way to the next stage. 

I've never came back from the pain well, because I finally became me. 

Facebook

It Knocks You Down

"say u gotta put the good with the bad, 

happy & the sad.

so will u bring a better future 

than i had in the past?

oh 'cause, i don’t wanna make 

the same mistakes i did. 

i don’t wanna fall back on my face again. 

i’ll admit it, i was scared to answer love's call 

& if it hits better make it worth the fall"

-Keri Hilson

Slow Down, I'm Not Like Them. Who Are You Kidding?