Tears.

I've been an emotional rollercoaster for the past few days. I get these surges of tears that I can't control. I really don't know why. I know I'm upset about the whole Courtney thing. It's more of the fact that I don't know what happened there, and I feel like "oh okay, this happened, AGAIN." It sucked because I really did like him a lot and we started off normal, compared to my other relations. I thought it would just keep moving at that pace, but it didn't. I wish I knew what I did to mess it up. It's haunting me.

I guess I just realize that I will have to get use to being alone. I know I say I don't want a relationship, but I would still like to have someone there to. To cuddle with, to kiss, to make smile. I don't know how to do this right.