Hard Luck

"sometimes i read books. sometimes i listen to music. sometimes i write. sometimes i look at the clouds for answers. sometimes i walk around aimlessly looking around, searching for something unnoticeably beautiful to sweep me off my feet to remind me just how much beauty there is in the simplest of things in life. sometimes i wonder about you and just how much i should let go and how much i should keep within the photos of my mind. sometimes i wonder how it’s possible to love someone so much that it breaks you. sometimes i think about all of these things that have happened in my life. sometimes these are all just sunny hazed memories in my mind that i can no longer recall. like somehow i forgot how to feel and embrace things with a sense of open-mindedness. sometimes i forget that i deserve to be loved as well. sometimes i lose myself in thoughts of empty promises. “i’m trying,” is really all i can give you. but a multitude of words and stories in my mind that i can’t seem to organize and arrange are somehow making things hard for me to find my niche. because at the end of the day these are just words. empty words that don’t mean a thing to you and to the rest of the world. this is just a place i’m in. a moment within a moment. i’m not trying to down play this fire inside of me. this isn’t a plea for help or pity. i might be a little bit lost. i might be a little bit lonely. i might be a little bit confusing. i might be a little bit sentimental. i might be a little bit weird. i’m a little bit of everything. i may be alone on all of this, but at the end of the day, just like you and me, we all just want to find our place in the sun. and that’s all we ever really know for sure. these are just words after all."