A Fine Line Between Picky and Not Settling

"'She’s single because she knows what she wants: she doesn’t settle' …”Oh Jim? He didn’t stand a chance…his ears were too big and you know how I feel about that…” Sound familiar? I agree that no one should settle for someone that they are not head-over-heals for…chemistry is everything when finding a companion, but how do we (non-attached) know we are “just settling” or being unrealistic and ”too picky”?

Meeting eligible people gets ever harder once you are older…in high school it was like hormones on a sugar high. In college, I remember being so overwhelmed with all the guys I wanted to date. Now, in my late 20’s it’s “Uh, the UPS dude is pretty cute…well, if he lost the inner tube and Jason Priestley sideburns”…okay, I’m being very dramatic, but you start to set your standards a little higher, as your age grows because the eligible men (numbers) start to plummet. Is having big ears, or a gut being too picky or not settling because those flaws are not what your ideal mate has? I don’t know the awnser anymore….what I DO know, is the longer you wait around for Mr. Right…the longer you are single….which could also be the best thing ever….or the worst.

So, when do you know that your are just not settling (waiting around for the perfect guy that probably will never come, anyways) or just being unrealistic and picky? It’s a very fine line that many women I know have been trying to balance on. Some fall off and settle but some wait around for the absolute “real thing” if that is even possible."

"I totally get this and I can relate because I’m also in my late twenties and for the most part, I don’t necessarily see it as settling or being picky.. I think as we grow older, we just start to realize what’s more important in the person we want to end up with. This reminds me of a quote from Up In The Air: “You’re young. Right now you see settling as some sort of failure…Don’t worry. By the time someone is right for you, it won’t feel like settling…and the only person left to judge you will be the 24 year old girl with a target on your back.”

Maybe I’m just a hopeful romantic, but I’d like to think that’s true."