11 AM

"Seven am;
The garbage truck beeps as it backs up
And I start my day thinking about what I've thrown away.
Could I push rewind?
The credits traverse, signifying the end
But I missed the best part.
Could we please go back to start?
Forgive my indecision

Then again, you're always first when no one's on your side
But, then again, a day will come when I want off that ride.

Eleven am,
By now you would think that I would be up
But my bedsheets shade the heat of choices I've made
And what did I find?
I never thought I could want someone so much
'Cause now you're not here and I'm knee deep in that old fear.
Forgive my indecision... I am only a man.

Then again, you're always first when no one's on your side
But, then again, a day will come when I want off that ride.

Twelve pm and my dusty telephone rings.
Heavy head up from my pillow, who could it be?
I hope its you.

Then again, you're always first when no one's on your side
But, then again, the day has come and I want off that ride."

Incubus has the ability to make me feel better. Think clearer.

I know when I started this that I wasn't going to make the same mistakes. I reached out, because whenever I start to feel something, I think of you. I want, I wish to be okay with you. But I know you can easily fuck with me head. Maybe, one day you won't have that power over me. But, not today. I'm not ruining this just yet. I'm hoping I grew enough, learned from my repetitive mistakes. I'm hoping that I can leave the "old you" behind, embrace what you become, and walk right passed you. I'm hoping that maybe one day I can finally open myself up again, it's getting too lonely being on my own. I'm down with these games, I bow out. Good match old heartache. But you won't win this one.